Nobody loves me, everybody hates me, I’m going down the garden to eat worms!

Under London Map. 1/6. Print and collage £50

And they’ll be big slimy worms at that! And I’ll have a big belly full of them and they’ll munch on my insides until I’m actually all worm, but you won’t know it, I’ll still look like me, but inside I’ll be all worm and I’ll be carrying out tasks for the worm civilisation, and meeting once a month in the mud with all the worms and discussing what to do with those troublesome humans.

The End

There is an exhibition at the Hundred Years gallery in Hoxton, that started last Thursday night. It is called Notes From the Underground after Dostoyevsky’s book by the same name. I have a work in it, the Under London Map above, but so far I haven’t been able to attend any of it.

How ironic that I can not attend the party because of epilepsy- Dostoyevsky was epileptic, and the same type of epilepsy as me, a lot of his books have characters that have epilepsy. Maybe not Notes From the Underground, I haven’t finished reading that yet.

The map I’ve put in the exhibition is from my story about Under London. I started it many moons ago and there are still many moons to decorate the sky before I finish it. Still it feels good bringing it out for an airing. I was going to do a short performance/reading and a couple of songs about the Spletzer-Martin 5 story (as it was originally known) at the opening night, but alas this is when I was struck down with a particularly unpleasant seizure.

So all in all I’m in a very bad mood at present, and having nightmares about how everyone hates me. I hope to be going along to Hundred Years at around 5 tonight, if anyone fancies joining me, in spirit or in flesh. Maybe tell me you don’t actually hate me.

I know many of you won’t read this until after the event, but maybe send a good spirit or two back in time.

Below is a quote from Dostoyevsky to try and keep spirits up, I sometimes get the same ecstatic feeling as him, just before a seizure, though unfortunately the ones this week have lacked much of that. Still it’s worth having experienced this just once in a life time.

” For several instants I experience a happiness that is impossible in an ordinary state, and of which other people have no conception. I feel full harmony in myself and in the whole world, and the feeling is so strong and sweet that for a few seconds of such bliss one could give up ten years of life, perhaps all of life.”

Not so much a worm as a larvae. Detail from my handmade one off book called Small Beasts and Funny Chocolate £350
Small Beasts and Funny Chocolate Handmade one off book.£350

Ben’s Dreams from Hell, the Rude Mechanicals Duo, my Helmagohater and a reward for knowing the loft dweller.

Another blog from me, you wait months for one to come along then two come right next to each other. There is so much to be mentioned!

Firstly, this Saturday is the final night of the Supernatural exhibition at Hundred Years Gallery. Rude Mechanicals Duo (me & Cos) will be doing an acoustic set with friends, Seven Headed Raven will be playing and there will be low down dirty Tarot reading if you get there early.

During this evening, if you come up to me and whisper the word “Helmagohater” in my left ear, you can have 50% off any of my artworks.

Helmagohater was a secret world I invented as a child. Half was ice and half was fire, and there was a strip down the middle where all the people, plants and animals lived. It was very Lord of the Rings. I was an elfin princess (of course) who rode around on a large white horse doing heroic deeds to stop the invasion of the fire and the ice into the middle land.

Later this month, on the 19th November at The Others, is the Book Launch of Ben Hell’s Dreams from Hell.

For those of you that didn’t know Ben, he was a well known, popular, and some would say notorious, character on the London music scene. He ran Club Hell for many years, playing with bands and putting together strange and wonderful compilations of stories and songs. Dreams from Hell is a book compiling of his dreams, created by his friends. The dreams are laid out alongside beautiful illustrations from his friends; artists illustrators cartoonists and musicians.

The book – cover image (below) by Estelle Riviere – is available to order now from Steve Poulacheris,

Dreams from Hell book cover, by Estelle Riviere

For those of you that don’t live in London but still manage to read my blogs, I will send you a small present if you can tell me the name of the man that lives in my loft. Filling the space with his pink bulky body…

The winter is coming now, I can feel the cold in my bones. I’m considering hibernation. Bears get to do it, why can’t I?