the Outside (and a naked podcast)

Today I left my tower and ventured into the outside world.

Wearing my sequinned mask and red velvet cape I initially felt protected by the magic force, but it wasn’t long into the journey when my sequins became nervous, they warned me of the dangers that lurked. Strangers in sinister face coverings skulked in every shop. A helicopter flew above me, constantly purring in the summer sky. It tracked my movements, checking I didn’t fall out of line, didn’t disobey.

A hot day. Pink and red skinned beasts lay virtually naked on the public garden lawn. Why don’t they grow fur like other animals? Its so much more attractive. Miss, my cat, agrees. I walked once around the block and returned hurriedly to my tower, daring not to enter a shop incase they shot me with their germ loaded machine guns, I know they hide such things behind the counter.

At home I have tea and fresh cake ( an experiment with albino rats this time). Miss tells me off for having left the tower. I should have listened to her, but I had finished the animation (coming out with the Rude Mechanicals new album in the spring next year), and I’d podded the podcast with the rest of the Rudes –

and I just wanted to check that the outside world still existed and wasn’t just a hologram projected on to my windows.

Well it does exist, and it’s dangerous.

Rats, aphids, and dust – Lockdown in my Tower

So, I ask myself, what have you been doing these last few months in your lockdown tower?

The answer struggles to come forward, a deep grey blur holds itself over my mind like winter morning fog. Perhaps I was just switched off for the past few months, like a robot, and am only now being switched on again, my circuits slowly getting back into function.

Then from within the fog breaks through the memory of baking cake, making animations, and creating a sculpture of the inside of my brain for my friend Nic.

The cake tasted nice, the animation was and is obsessive, the brain sculpture unfinished, it sits and stairs at me from the corner of the room, thinking.

I am now a very big creature with semi-transparent skin and round fish like eyes.

Where did I get the ingredients from for baking cake from when I haven’t left the tower?

Ah yes, I remember, the rats that the cat kills for me.

(Its hard to tell myself from the cat and perhaps we are becoming one beast.)

The dust in the corners tastes like flour

(or at least what I remember of it)

Sweetened up with delicious aphid poo from the lime tree that grows just outside my window.

All brewed up in my cauldron to create a delicious cake.

Would you like me to post you some?

And of course helped down with a large glass of whiskey.

Photo be the imaginary Lord Martland.